as promised

^^^ if only…

^^^ i LOVE gemma!!! she’s so beautiful

can i talk about something a little off topic? right now i’m experiencing semi-requited love. he’s with someone and he’s very committed (ie committed to be engaged) but i know that he has feelings for me and has probably thought a couple of if… then… statements regarding me. and i wish he would admit this, though i understand he can’t, but it’s painful. it’s painful to know that the feelings are there but a relationship will probably never even be attempted… wasted feelings… so close, yet so far… and to know that i’ll probably never get any confirmation of this from him… that i could be imagining it, though i’m not the only one who sees it… no, sir.

i don’t think that anyone should have to wonder, and i think that if someone attached does wonder, it might be an indication that something in the relationship is awry. not that i’ve ever been in a serious relationship… those are just my thoughts, if they’re comprehensible.

i just wish there was something bold, but not destructive to him or his current relationship that i could do to… i don’t know… feel somewhat satisfied that i did all i could to make this one dream really happen.

what do you think? (i’m sorry that i’ve been asking so many questions lately)

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